10/15/2006

A comparison

So I am a large guy. I know this, everyone who sees me knows this, it is just a fact of life. This last week, I had the experience of urinating in two different airport bathrooms. I know this sounds like a dirty joke, but bear with me. First, Las Vegas. Las Vegas has a newer airport. I went into the bathroom, did my business and walked out. (Of course I washed my hands, that is included in doing my business.) St. Louis on the other hand, has an older airport. I went in there and was sadly disappointed. Now for the female readership who has never been in a men's room, the urinals typically have little wall barriers to prevent peaking. In St. Louis these walls were so close together that my shoulders were touching the walls. My options were either wedge myself in, or stand back and se how good I was at long distance shooting. Now if you are like me you tend to try to touch as little as possible in a public bathroom, but despite the temptation, I decided it best if I didnt whip out willy in the middle of the room and see what I could hit. To prevent this story from getting more graphic, lets just sum up with, I am by far not the largest person on the planet, and while I am a big guy, if I have trouble fitting in at a urinal, there are a lot of people that just dont have the option of urinating in St. Louis. All in all, I give the St. Louis airport bathroom a 0 out of 5, and Las Vegas gets a 5 out of 5.

2 comments:

Matt said...

Word up!

Sweet Cactus said...

i don't have a penis, but i feel for ya. you should write to lambert.
:)